Doing Good in Her Name

I just wanted to let you know that Peyton's parents have started a new website in her honor, www.doinggoodinhername.com. Many people have asked over the past 14 months how they can help children like Peyton and their families. Well now, thanks to this website, we all have the opportunity to help. Peyton's parents have started a program to help critically ill children and their families at Connecticut Childrens Medical Center, the same hospital where Peyton spent her life being cared for. Please take a moment to check out the website. Thank you! :)

It's hard to believe that today marks one year since we had to say good-bye to baby Peyton.

How can we possibly sum up the way this past year has changed us? When Peyton left this world, a beautiful piece our hearts left too. That unspeakable sadness remains, and will continue to remain. After all, things should be different. She should be here, with us.

Peyton, we know you are with God and with all of Heaven's other children. And we are trying to focus on what you have taught us through your strength and the sweet time we got to spend with you, hold you, and look into your beautiful eyes. Please continue to watch over your mommy and daddy, and help us all to see the light beyond the clouds and rain. We love you, Peyton Elizabeth- forever and always.

Peyton's First Birthday

On September 4th, a few of Peyton's family and friends gathered at the cemetery to celebrate Peyton's first birthday with a baloon send-off, where we sent our messages to Peyton up into the sky. You may be surprised that I used the word "celebrate". However, that is exactly what we did. This past year has brought with it sadness beyond words. But for that one month that Peyton was with us, she blessed all of our lives in countless ways. She was born on that special day- September 4th- and for four weeks transformed all of our lives with her beauty and her strength. Nothing, not even the heartbreak, can ever change that. Happy birthday, precious Peyton Elizabeth!

Please find below a slideshow (also on Kristin's "Once A Mother" blog, as well as some additional photos and videos from this special day.

Kristin has started a new blog in Peyton's memory. Please visit it at www.onceamother.blogspot.com.

As most of you probably know, Peyton's uncle Mike is shaving his head in 3 days. He is doing so in honor of Peyton, and as part of a St. Baldrick's fundraiser to raise money for childrens cancer research. It is our sincerest hope that, through organizations like St. Baldrick's, there will come a time when no other families have to go through the pain that Peyton's family has had to endure. Please visit Mike's Saint Baldrick's page at www.stbaldricks.org/participants/shavee_info.php?ParticipantKey=2009-327386#

To our wonderful family, friends and the countless supportive strangers who have stumbled upon Peytons journey and this blog,

It goes without saying that this has been the toughest time of our life. Experiencing Peyton's journey, from her entrance into this world to her ascension to the next, has been filled with many emotions. There has been anger, despair, grief but through our darkest moments we have felt overwhelmed by the unbelievable outpouring of comfort, support and love that so many of you have shown to us. Peyton was an incredible little girl and as her mother I often wonder if she is working from above sending you all to surround us with love and support. No one should ever have to go through the loss of a child, it is a crushing inexplicable grief, but through this journey you have all sent us the message that we are not alone. Your support through this trevail has meant more than any words can ever express. Through our tears and grief we have felt your love and your kindness has not gone unnoticed. We just really wanted to take a moment to let you all know the profound impact that your love has had on our entire family.

Regards,
Kristin and Dru

Here is an email written from Kristin to the priest. He ended up using this email word-for-word, as a tribute to Peyton during the funeral:

Father,

Here is the second reading that we have chosen. I believe you had all the other information as far as the first reading, songs, psalm etc. Please let me know if you need anything else before tomorrows service. You had asked if there was anything specific to mention tomorrow and I had some trouble putting it into words but I would really like Peyton's spirit to come across. She went through these fights without complaints, as babys go she was extremely unfussy and always greeted each day with bright eyes and interest in all those around her. She allowed us to love her and hold her, to snuggle with her and cuddle her despite all of her tubes, infections, medications, and discomfort. I have never received such unguarded love in my life as I did from this sweet little baby and I have never experienced such fullness as when I held her skin to skin and watched her turn her head to hear my heartbeat and fall asleep. I know that many people think of her only as a fragile sick little thing but she was so much more than that. She had an incredible strength, wisdom and spirit that came through when she looked into our eyes. With all of the poking and prodding, the surgeries, the pain, the medication she really never complained. As her parents we would watch her go through this fight and we would start to cry because we knew the odds were so stacked against her and she would look at us with an expression that said "whats the big deal" It was as if she was trying to comfort us and say "hey mom and dad why are you so sad, Im Ok, its not so bad, see Im chugging right along, Im still here" That was Peyton being Peyton. Her loss is so much harder because she is really the one that comforted us throughout her sickness. The doctors would give us one terrible report after the other and we would come back to the room, hold her and have hope and faith that she was going to be that 1 percent to make it through. We never ever thought we would lose her so soon. I would really like for all those who never got to meet her in person to know that about her.

Thank you.
Kristin Binder


A Reading from the Letter of St. Paul to the Philippians 2:1-4,14-18
If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing. But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. So you too should be glad and rejoice with me.